


Enough

by chantalis



Series: Connor Rhodes x Reader [1]
Category: Chicago Fire, Chicago Med
Genre: F/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-10-26
Updated: 2020-10-26
Packaged: 2021-03-09 00:00:42
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,488
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27204899
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/chantalis/pseuds/chantalis
Summary: You don't quite know how, but you ended up in a toxic relationship with Connor Rhodes. And you've had enough.
Relationships: Connor Rhodes/Reader, Connor Rhodes/You
Series: Connor Rhodes x Reader [1]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1986094
Kudos: 2





	Enough

It was another day at Firehouse 51. Sylvie Brett, my fellow paramedic on ambulance 61, noticed I wasn’t in the sunniest of moods. “(Y/N), are you okay?” I could tell from the look in her eyes that any response other than the truth would not be accepted. I sighed. “No.” She nodded, urging me to continue.”It’s Connor... He’s... You know what, it might be better to let you see for yourself.” You unlocked your phone and handed it to her, your messages with Connor displayed on the screen. 

You sat silently, watching as Sylvie scrolled through your phone, her lips tightening, jaw locking, eyes hardening. Suddenly she turned off my phone and tossed it onto my cot with a scoff. She stood up off of her cot and began to pace angrily. “How dare he! What gives him the right to blame you for things that happened that were either his fault or something no one could control! His dad died, that sucks, but that gives him no right to lay into you about how much he disapproved of you.”

“Sylvie, he didn’t just start this because his dad died. He’s done this before. Whenever he gets stressed he lashes out. And I’m not the only person he’s done this with. Robyn and Ava both warned me. I took their words into account but just didn’t... accept them, I guess. I should have, though. Now I’m in a toxic relationship and I don’t know what to do.” I looked at the floor. I had just admitted, out in the open, what felt like the heaviest, dirtiest secret that had ever been forced upon you. Your eyes started to water and suddenly, you couldn’t keep holding the tears back like you had been the last few months. You broke out into fierce, heaving, uncontrollable sobs. You felt small hands circle your shoulders and pull you into the crook of someone’s neck. You just curled into them and let everything go.

You woke up to someone shaking you. “(Y/N), you need to wake up. It’s the end of shift.” You groggily open your eyes and sit up. “What?”

“You cried yourself to sleep earlier, and we didn’t get another call out so we all let you sleep. How are you feeling?”

“Done.” Sylvie raised her eyebrow at my answer. “The next time I see Connor I’m going to talk to him about this.”

“Are you going to break up with him?”

“Probably. I don’t deserve to be treated this way.”

I rolled my shoulders back as I unlocked the door to Connor’s penthouse apartment. “Connor?” The lights are on, so I know that someone is here.”(Y/N)? What’re you doing here?” Connor’s voice was gruff and irritated. “I texted you telling you not to come over, I had a busy day.”

“Connor, we need to talk.”

“(Y/N), I just told you I had a long day. Can’t whatever you have to say wait until tomorrow?” Connor was growing increasingly agitated and I could practically feel the anger bubbling inside of him. His eyes looked like sunken black holes, his hair in disarray, and his overall posture tense and confrontational. Even though he was saying the opposite, he was looking for a fight.

“I need a break from you.” It was as if my words had dropped chunks of ice down the back of his shirt. Connor jumped up and flailed his arms. “What?! Why?!”

“I can’t do it anymore. I can’t keep fighting with you about and taking the blame for things that were not only not my fault, but I also couldn’t control. Your mood swings have been giving me whiplash, and you expect me to always be there waiting for you. To wait until you’re done doing whatever and acting however you want. You have so many deeply personal issues that you refuse to talk about with me or anyone else who could help. Our relationship is incredibly toxic, and I can’t take it anymore. I deserve better.”

“(Y/N), no, you can’t leave me, not now. I know that I’ve been stressed out because my dad died but-”

“No, no buts. This has been going on for months. It didn’t just start after your dad died. Connor, I really just- I’m- I can’t... I am done.” I started to cry, this conversation taking an emotional toll on me. Connor closed the distance between us and tried to reach for me. “No, Connor, don’t. I’ve had enough. It’s over, I’m sorry but it’s over.” I walked out of his apartment as fast as I could and didn’t stop moving until I was sitting in my locked car. 

It had been a year since I last saw Connor in any capacity other than professional, and even then I never actually looked at him. Just rattled on what was wrong with the patient and left. Sylvie, Stella, and I were sitting in a booth at Molly’s. “Today was rough. I am so glad that I am off shift tomorrow, I am going to sleep all day.”

“Me too, but maybe a long soak somewhere in there.”

“That sounds like an excellent idea (Y/N), mind if I copy?” Sylvie asked with a chuckle. She suddenly quieted, and Stella’s face turned hard and vicious. You turned around to see what they were staring at. The sight made your breath leave your lungs. Connor stood at the bar, staring at you. He looked different than the last time you saw him. His eyes were lighter, whereas before they’d been sunken, his smile looked genuine, before it had been tense and sometimes fake. The biggest aesthetic change was that he shaved his beard. He gives a little nervous wave and smile. I wave back, not knowing what else to do. Connor, however, takes this as a sign that he can approach me. “Hi, (Y/N)? Can I talk to you?” Sylvie grips her glass in anger and Stella looks ready to beat him into the ground. All three of them turned to look at me, awaiting my decision. “Um, ok, sure.” I set my drink down and turn to face him. “Alone?” His voice is laced with something that I can’t place. Unease? Anxiety? “Alright.” He looks relieved, and tension disappears from his form, before coming back when we are seated in a back booth together, away from everyone else. “I was not a good boyfriend. To you and my other exes. There is no reasonable excuse for my behaviour. I am so sorry. You and our relationship meant so much to me, and I... didn’t show it. I wanted to talk because first of all, you deserved an apology, and second because... well, I was wondering if you would allow me the opportunity of trying to earn your trust. I understand if you need time to think about this, and that’s-”

“Hold up, just what is your end goal, here?”

“Well,” he sighed, “I would like to get back together after I’ve earned your trust, if you’ll let me, but I just want to be back in your life. I want to go to the aquarium whenever they have new exhibits, and to watch Disney movies whenever one of us loses a patient, and make Polish food like your ‘mama’ used to make while I try so hard to sing along to the songs you’re singing in Polish. I want you back in my life because you are an amazing, intelligent, strong person who won’t put up with any BS because you’re right, you do deserve better than that.”

“Connor, your toxic behaviour,” he winced at that “it was really bad. How do I know it won’t happen again?”

“I’ve been going to therapy. At least once a week, more if possible. I, I’m doing a lot better. Like I said, if you need to take time to think about this, take as much as you want.”

“Ok, I’ll think about it.”

“Really?” He looked like a little kid who’d just been surprised with a kitten. “Yes, I’ll think about it. I’m going to get back to the girls now, I’ll talk to you later, I guess?”

“Yeah,” his eyes were shining and he was radiating happiness, “yeah, I’ll talk to you later.”

I was immediately subjected to questions by the entire Firehouse, who had all noticed that I’d been talking with Connor, alone. “Well?” Stella asked, clearly frustrated I hadn’t answered anything yet. “I am going to think about allowing him to earn my trust. I’m not going to settle on any kind of decision tonight, so can you all just drop it?”

“Fine, but you owe Stella and I details and drinks at your place this Thursday, when the three of us are off shift.”

“Yeah, dinner, too. I have a feeling we’re going to have a lot to talk about, (Y/N).”

“Alright, deal.”


End file.
